The bad news: your bride is fucking someone else on your wedding night.
The good news: she's using a condom.
The bad news: he just told her to stop so he can take it off.
The good news: she's on the pill.
The bad news: she's going to make you lick her clean 'just to be on the safe side'.
The good news: she knows you will hate the taste of it.
The bad news: she knows cum is an acquired taste and that eventually you'll get used to it.
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